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After a while, your tears dry on there own. There is no one here to save you from yourself. You must realize, you cry silent tears to the world. It's not that no one cares, its just that we all have lives to live, and we are amongst the generation of zombies.

The cops patrol the busy streets.

The white tourist look in awe.

The homeless man looks for change...

and a place to sleep.

The workers- WORK

The teenagers- PLAY

and the drivers DRIVE to their destination in delay

And all while i'm sitting here, watching the world go round. I am too thankful to wear a frown. I worship the only God that wears the crown, and he told me...to follow his word!

And as I sing praises with my tongue; I no longer have the urge to cry. For the Lord will never give us too much to handle. And if I'm going through this-- its a foreshadow that I MUST be great

And I FORESHADOW that I MUST be GREAT!

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There she goes...yet another blank face. Her gender must be female because of her grace.

" There is not enough time" she tells the world, to win this race, you must pass the toll of finding yourself. But how do you find yourself in a bin full of sin? How do you wash away regret and pain and sorrow and hurt and the drug life that starts, ends, and begins with the simple roll- up and nimble fingers to break the green into a lighted torch, where we blow circles of our lives into the smoke of our natural air. How do we repair the lungs in which have become full of water, and fire, and toxins? How do you complete the thread of our daily lives, when the only nettle we own has dulled, and broken into two? We must realize that the change is in you. SO don't change your appeal, or fix your hair for you will always be as sinful as the materials you wear!

Day of Silence

Tho is National day of silence has been around 14 years, today around noon was my first of hearing it. and to make my experience even better, i was high.
So i get to class and my friend Chris was silent. he explained to me his support on Gay awareness reguarding bullying on a piece of paper, but i didnt take much notice to it. i thought he was the only one, i thought this was just made up. i dint take it very serious. it was when my friend Staci took charge and more allured me to know more.

"The National Day of Silence brings attention to anti-LGBT name-calling, bullying and harassment in schools. This year’s event will be held in memory of Lawrence King, a California 8th-grader who was shot and killed Feb. 12 by a classmate because of his sexual orientation and gender expression. Hundreds of thousands of students will come together on April 25 to encourage schools and classmates to address the problem of anti-LGBT behavior. "

after excitement on the issue, i as well WOKE UP. i was silent. i went to class
the sight i then saw had a huge impact on me
the way the other student reacted to what other ppl supported
they called it dumb. stupid. made me feel bad i was doing it on the first place
i felt like a total outcast
not only becasue iwas supporting gay and lesbian bullying
but becasue i too was an outcast
and they looked at me with such disguest
like i didnt belong
but since i was there, let things be
GUIET YOURSELF
i was then put into a bubble
a way fron society
away from this life
...this censored life

so i stood up
i clapp...litterally
7 times
as loud as i could

and no one looked at me
i jumped up
clapped
made noises
but no one would ake notice me
i was terrified
i knnew then...
what the purpose of tofay is really about

like i said earlier
i am not only taking a stand for homosexual behaviors
but for being yourself
for being who you reallty are, not not being scared to come to school
..and be KILLED for i t

today, the issue is bullying
what could tommorrow bring
we must take a stand now
relate this to your life, to your struggle
stand up for freedom of expression
for speech
for life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness

and dont silence yourself
FUCK society
be heard young ppl
be heard....

Last Summer

to an extent, 2oo8 was a horriable year
the school i attended in St. Marys Co. was completely unique blind
and i had but 1 friend
my mother tried to make me into something she had done,
but never completed
and her husband was abusive, controllive, a religious freak
and hated my exsistence in his presence
but it was ok, i worked everyday, and made great grades

i just had no life
coming home... where i am now seemed like an virtue
instead of a venture
i made my self miserable
and i lost a lot of the things people looked forward seeing in me
my LIFE n STYLE

i smoked everyday
which isnt a bad thing, just not for me
or adleast not the enviroment it took place in

I GRADUATED

seemed like everything changed suddenly
good things happened
i mean i still had issues that arised but overall....
i felt slight happiness

NETWORKING SUMMER 2oo8
major moves happening
ive had more professional photoshoots this summer
then in my whole life

MODELS INC. STARTING A REVOLUTION

Seriously, no shade
im not just saying this becasue im walking with them
but MODELS INC. is truly about building self esteem, develope runway skills, and providing a place where young adult can express themselves

LIES, SECRETS, & RUMORS T. pt.2
AUGUST 22, 2OO8 AT 7:OO
BOWIE ERFORMING ARTS CENTER
TICKETS 2O ADVANCE 3O DOOR

CONTACT ME

lol, i had to do my promotion thing
so like i was saying, things are going good

well besides me getting stopped and wrote u by the cops at gallery place
for jumping the METRO, lol

loosing my LX on the train

loosing money as well

having to walk to whole U STREET making me late for practice

and starting that thing girls have

ALL IN THE SAME DAY

but i wont fret

life is good

God is GREAT

untill next time

OBAMA

My mom seems to like to send me forwords. here is the lastest one:


The economic crisis is growing more serious every day, and the time for action has come.

Last week, the House of Representatives passed the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act, which will jumpstart our economy and put more than 3 million people back to work.

I hope to sign the recovery plan into law in the next few weeks. But I need your help to spread the word and build support.

It's not enough for this bill to simply pass Congress. Americans need to know how it will affect their lives -- they need to know that help is on the way and that this administration is investing in economic growth and stability.

Governor Tim Kaine has agreed to record a video outlining the recovery plan and answering questions about what it means for your community. You can submit your questions online and then invite your friends, family, and neighbors to watch the video with you at an Economic Recovery House Meeting.

Join thousands of people across the country by hosting or attending an Economic Recovery House Meeting this weekend.

The stakes are too high to allow partisan politics to get in the way.

That's why I've consulted with Republicans as well as Democrats to put together a plan that will address the crisis we face.

I've also taken steps to ensure an unprecedented level of transparency and accountability. Once it's passed, you will be able to see how every penny in this plan is being spent.

You can help restore confidence in our economy by making sure your friends, family, and neighbors understand how the recovery plan will impact your community.

Sign up to host or attend an Economic Recovery House Meeting and submit your question for the video now:

http://my.barackobama.com/recovery

Our ability to come together as a nation in difficult times has never been more important.

I know I can rely on your spirit and resolve as we lead our country to recovery.

Thank you,

President Barack Obama

P.S. -- If you can't host or attend an Economic Recovery House Meeting, you can still submit your questions for Governor Kaine and then share the video with your friends and family this weekend. Learn more here:

http://my.barackobama.com/recovery




i hope you enjoy!

Creed

1. Don't let your parents down...
They brought you up

2. Be humble enough to obey
You may be giving orders one day

3. Choose campanions with care
You become what they are

4. Guard your thoughts
What you think, you are

5. Choose only a date
Who would make a good mate

6. Be master of your habits, or
They will master you

7. Dont let the crowd pressure you
Stand for something
Or you'll fall for nothing

I Just Wanna Be Successful

I want the money $$$
cars...
clothes...
hoes =] (i Suppose)
i just wanna be Successful

yeah Drizzy, me too.
and i smoke weed for the same purposes as you do
money, cars, clothes are the luxeries of the mind
it defines that part of you that is so materlisitic as I define
and the more smoke i blow out, the more ideas come in sight
like even when you try with all your heart, it will always be a might
but i have come this far, no turning back. fa real
FCUK IT
cause the life i was leading was so heavy, i was blind
i was used, and abused, and lacked hugs, and did drugs
oh drugs
lots of drugs
ive seen so much green in the month of march
but so high i get, but never really lifted
i was never grant permision to put my sight, which i envision

i just wanna be successful
i want the money $$$
cars...
clothes...
hoes =]] ( i suppose)
i just wanna be successful

Now you act like this is unfamiliar
Money, Cars, Clothes, Hoes ;LIKE I FUCKING FEEL YA
Its like, basically you want the luxeries of life
and hoes and hoes instead of bunnin up your wife
but me, im soo cool, its crazy im so far gone
This weed im smoking now got me so far in the zone
think.think.think
(and i feel my voice start the quiver) and my HEART
jumpstarts twice to ease my liver...
and this liquor, oh this liquor
easy tember, sweet november

Amy Winehouse in the Sunflower Season

I want to run into the sun while it rises. The rush of its heat is intense because I feel it from here. I wish I had the sleep the sun did. And I bet the moon is smacked sleep from yesterday's wild ass night. I want to run into the sun, because everyone follows its lead. We make fabrics from its illumination. Its confusing how blind I become if I look into her too close. Do you see how spring has melted the snow away? But does it melt away all our mistakes? Im making memories in the Hottest Summer!

Through experinces, I've developed a higher learning. As my restless mind argues with my dragged out legs, I continue on this transit watching the Districts, and the Burroughs, and the Streets, and Avenues slip by my very fingers. Time has placed me here, in this very moment. I must take advantage, yet I feel as if if I slipped one more time, that would be my all. If I losted asstray, my mind is good today. Thank you for being kind to me Lord. Aint sin so damn sexy. My pointer finger has a gold rock ring that would make good for a one night stand. Its so warm in the city. I arrived back to my destination just in time to see the sunrise. I kept singing Winehouse in my head, while I sipped my HardLemonaid. Life is so precious. My life is so fragile. Nothing else matters. Ive been to the bottom, and its pretty cold down here. But all I can do is get higher, Progress, and get higher and higher. Peace be with me, and the ones who are alone at night. Its not that im afraid of the dark, its just that no one else is home. And I feel as tho my other half is gone. Not me, but in sight. I feel like im painted half white, with the other eletric blue, while the other stands nude waiting for a MAN-TO-CURE.

I caught the 1 train, so if you can meet me at Christopher and Bleeker, that would be great. Im in the village, being a villager ( look at her)

Its 5:34am and its 72 degrees outside. Ive been smoking all day, and eating madd food. Its feels goood!

THE CHASE

"So we dont confirm the fling, you keep avoiding all my questions. The Pressures ON!
-Drizzy

I tend to hold back to the one who I want to give my all. I'm just afraid to take that chance, and endulge in the fall. And from there I will crawl, but now here I stand, and i'm sure you have no idea how much i'm in demand. But it's hard trending water with only one hand. And you could have another, but your worth The Chase. I wouldn't even call you the bait. Your rivers so long compared to these other girls lake. I want to swim in you, and tye a rope to your tree, but I wanna plant something in your I didn't know was in me. I dont know you that well, and you hardly know me.I saw you a hand full of times, but its only now I see. Im running after you, and your running after me. Your looks arent everything, but your beautiful, you see. Your not Brand New. We could be a couple, me and you. I ask people about you, and I seem to study your name. There arent enough pictures to study your frame. But if you were in front of me, I wouldnt be ashamed. To confess this note in which no one is tagged. Nothing to obvious, not that your mad. I hope you know its YOU. I hope that your the one. I wanna say hello, the closer I come.

Your the meal I must eat.
Your that pill when I cant sleep.
Your the light on my computer at night
Your that scary movie, and im without fright
Without you...I just might move on
Cause this feeling, im feeling, is just wayy to strong
esp. for someone I barely know
Us not being together, YES, I can still grow
And you shine light to those who are tense about being different
But to me, you are the DISHES

I got these wishes, and they only come at night. I dont feel like your wrong, but I think I am right.
I'm right for you that is.

Here is my card, I could give you the bussssinesss.

April 28th

I didn't want to NOT call you on your birthday. You swear your the last thing on my mind. Is there anything that I can do to fix it? All my heart is asking for is time, time.

As soon as I heard you voice my heart broke, because it was apparent that I wasn't the one you wanted to be talking to. Someone said you were probably high. I don't care. Doesn't matter either way. I know you.

And the worst part is, I KNOW YOU!

I want to forget you. Everyday I try.

But this love drips from me like molasses.

As Far As Me...

Libra- October 1st

today: Look at people and see them for who they really are -- don't fall for their act.

Daily Flirt:

You are going to have some fun today with someone you have a crush on, and the fun is going to be compounded by an unexpectedly rewarding intellectual conversation. Maybe this one's going to be serious.

Daily Singles:

Your going out routine is getting to be too much of the same thing. You need a fresh dose of inspiration. Brainstorm with your friends. Go somewhere new where you'll meet a new crop of potential dates.

(true)

Good Morning Facebook

idk...i just decided since i couldn't sleep, to write about a few thing that were on my mind. Lately i've been looking at my horoscopes. Not that I believe what it is they are saying, but sometimes it interest me, and I record the probability of any of them coming true.

Last night I was high as hell, and something weird happened at the party. Me and my best friend have this weird thing of like feeling the energy of the world, of our enviroment, surrounding, and certain people. Im not saying there was anything wrong with her, or her, or them, but like....idk....Honestly i feel like if i ever explain it would make nooo sense. so i wont. Just know this life thing is sooo weird.
So after the party, me and kara came back to her crib and recorded some stuff. she convinced me to watch "DoomsDay: 2012" while she recorded me. Recorded my reactions, thoughts, feelings, ideas, basically everything I thought about "the last days" Look it up on Youtube, it is quite interesting.
Im thinking maybe thats why i didnt sleep. She went to sleep after that, but i stayed up and watched Steve- O trippin on drugs. Crazzzzzzzzyyy. I could never let drugs get a handle over me like that. I mean, who tripps on weed.....anyone.....exactly

SOOOO... i dont know what your doing today, but its OZKAR's Birthday MAYhem.
I feel like me and him have been vibin since the constant connect. Like he fits me like a glove, different in his own ways ofcourse, but we always seem to be on the same level.
H A P P Y B I R T H D A Y L O V E...T H I S W E E K E N D A B O U T Y O U L I K E S H I T

paradox (?)

i be deep in thought like shit.....im just tellin YOU exactly whats on my mind

I feel like with me trying to start relations with the new.... there is always an X factor...lmao
im serious....everyone is either just getting out of an relationship, or still tangled in one, or was never single in the first place. and yeah...love songs are sooooo much sadder when you dont have the one in which makes you think about them in that certain song...make sense.

Now, as far as my ex, i realize its not something i can just up and walk away from. The distance is easing the pain...for sure. But sometimes facebook isnt much help. We all need closure. i figure distance is mine.
music helps too....she always said that the one thing we will always have is itunes...lol
esp. Drake's album "so far gone" and Kanye's "808's and Heartbreaks"
see....that was my Coldest Winter... omg
I dont regret anything tho. The break- up was bad, but im over it, and this is the last time ill bring it up
but ur on m mind, my mind, my mind
not all the time, but just today...this morning....right now...along with everything else

"Love Struggles but never truely dies"
-Boop-p

"Nothing is Forever except your Forever21"
-i.fresh

i just like how this picture matches....(this picture)

I wrote this as my status once... it matched the moment
" We ignore those who want us, and want those who ignore us. We love those who hurt us, and hurt those who love us the most"


-next chapter-

Men sell there soul to a demon named lies
they give into sin that often by surprise
lead to revenge and deseat and often from the arise
of the ultimate SIN

RANDOM THOUGHTS

why is it that whenn Brittany Spears cuts off all her hair, she is crazy!
But people will jock the shit out of Amber Rose?

Whats up with this Swine Flu thing? Is it a pledge? Are people dying? Mexico? Pigs

why do we call them " the bait"? Are we just using them to get to the "bigger fish"?

do u really like me?

What would you do for weed? herb- hunters lol

SOO....remember The Chase.....she said i was too different....and thats cool too!

oh am i rappin you up?

lol